This Thanksgiving was the first holiday I spent away from my family. I had avoided the "now that we're married..." holiday talk for as long as possible, but this year I had no choice but to succumb to the splitting plan.
Luckily for us, Christmas isn't really an issue -- my family does a big Christmas Eve feast, and his does the whole Christmas morning thing, so we just fly from SF --> OC early on the 25th. But Thanksgiving is problematic. It's only one night, one indivisible meal. There's no time for a flight, even a short 90-minute one. And I'm an only child.
Plus, it goes without saying, my family is THE BEST at Thanksgiving (if I do say so myself).
{the fam, Thanksgiving 2011}
Last year was the first time Brian had Thanksgiving with my family. He gladly ate spanikopita in place of green bean casserole, he didn't complain a bit about missing his family (although I'm sure he did), and was happy to be there with mine.
This year, I owed him the same. But I worried I wouldn't be able to do it. I worried that I'd complain, or I'd be grumpy or sad or resent him for making me miss out on one of my favorite family days. I thought about it,
read about it, self-analyzed, tried to prep for an emotional meltdown.
And now I can tell you, the truth is it was totally fine. Better than fine -- it was
really really nice. When we got in the car headed to
Santa Barbara, I was just
grateful. Grateful to have Brian by my side, and grateful that I had a new family who was willing to add me to their table, include me in their traditions, and invite me into their holiday. I realized that it wasn't about me
(surprise!). It was about them. It was about making sure they knew that I was happy and thankful to have them in my life, and to have them welcome me into theirs.
And so it was a rite of passage of sorts, and it was important that I was there, for them, for me, for us. A very happy Thanksgiving! (A couple pictures
here if you want to see.)
P.S. We also started a little mini-Pearson-fam Thanksgiving tradition, just the two of us --
we ran our first turkey trot! (I know, I know, everyone's doing it these days -- but it was funnnn I swear.) It was a 4-miler in Santa Barbara, and we've made a pact to do it again next year in the Bay Area, no excuses!